My Path

I am a very spiritual person.  I always have been.  This is just a little bit about my spiritual path.  I think if you know what a person believes in and why, you know something that is very personal, and very awesome.

You don't have to agree with what I'm saying, because I'm not claiming to have the ultimate truth. I'm still searching for that myself.  Disagreements are perfectly healthy, and it's great to read things you disagree with, because it helps you grow in your own faith.  However, I am not looking to receive hateful comments.  I am a very respectful person, and I will treat you with respect, so I would greatly appreciate the same courtesy.  

And here's a quick note: I'm definitely not saying that if you disagree, you can't comment.  I would love to hear your comments about what you believe in, just be respectful, please!  Not just to me, but to anyone else who comments here.  Thank you!

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I do not belong to any particular religion.  I find religion highly fascinating, but something about the way I was raised as a Christian (which was blindly follow and you'll be okay) just really didn't sit well with me.

I was very young when I first learned many things about Christianity, and to this day they don't make sense.  I didn't know why women couldn't marry other women because if they were happy, it should be okay.  Right?  And I didn't know why God would have sent me to Hell if I didn't know who Jesus was (but luckily I wasn't born in a tribe in the Amazon that didn't know anything about Jesus, cause then I'd be screwed).  I didn't know why God would create animals without souls, because they live, breathe and bleed just like we do; and they raise families and can feel pain like us - they even have lots of the same things we do, like eyes and noses!  And what about those dinosaurs, how come they're not in the Bible?

From the age of four to around age nine I had these burning questions - and these are just a few of what I remember.   There was lots I couldn't figure out, and a lot of things seemed a little fishy. I asked questions that no one had the answers to; some would say good question, but not give me an answer; others would admit they didn't know; and some told me that it's wasn't important, to have faith like a child - but I was a child! I did have faith, and I wanted a freaking answer!

But no answers came.  Finally, around age 11 or 12, I began looking elsewhere for my answers.  And I'm so glad I did, because I have never felt more at peace or more close to the one who gave me life.  I am happy.  But it took me a long time to finally feel that way, to shed my old skin, to become renewed.

When I first began looking at all of the other religions out there, I was frustrated, confused, lost - even angry, depressed and I felt really helpless.  How did I know which was right, which was wrong?   Was I abandoning God or meeting Him for the first time?  It was really hard for me to find something I felt was true.  And then I found Wicca.  Things began to click for me then.  I abandoned everything I didn't really believe anyway and went straight into it, not questioning a darn thing, because questions were hard and everything was making sense so far.

But Wicca wasn't right for me either.  I'm thankful that Wicca was part of my journey, and I still follow the Rede, which is "An' it harm none, do what ye will" - but it's not my Truth.  Wicca seemed a little shady, too, like every other religion out there.  The more I read about its history is what turned me off the most, I think.  It claims to be an Old Religion, but it's a relatively new one.  It follows old traditions, but Wicca in and of itself is not old.  I know it's a little detail, but it bugs me.

From Wicca came Paganism - which is a word I feel best describes what I practice and believe, but I'm also not entirely happy with it.  I guess I just like the word Spiritual.  I love having a personal relationship with the Creator despite what names other people call him/her.  I do call upon the Lord and Lady, but I know that they're one and the same, and they go by thousands of other names.  Gods and Goddesses are like a disco ball - every deity is a mirror, and every mirror makes up the the One Thing, the source of all that is. But every mirror reflects light, and everyone's light shines at a different frequency, so each God looks a little bit different to everyone.  Hopefully that makes sense - if not, I can elaborate.

Anyway, that's where I am on my path now.  I still love learning about all different types of religions, because I think they all have some truth, and they all have some bullshit. And I don't want any of the crap in my life that I don't need - I just want the truth, and one day I'll find it.  But for now, I know I'm in the right place in my life.

Where are you in your path?  What do you believe in? Comment below, I would love to hear!  Have a wonderful day :)